It just so happens that the "Somewhere Near Westlake" timezone is in the same time zone as "Somewhere a Little Further Away From Westlake" (which is where I ordered from). I looked at my watch right when I hit the order button and it was 1:30 pm.
A little bit later, I got my confirmation notice from flowers.com... no problems... no worries... no mention of any issues or problems... nothing like:
Dear Paying Customer,Nope... nothing like that... all I got was a polished confirmation notice making me think the whole thing was on track for a successful same-day delivery.
We have successfully received your order and have processed your payment. Your money is safely in our coffers and is earning us interest. Your wife, on the otherhand, will not be receiving your flowers on time, as was suggested by our website when you ordered the product and paid for it.
We apologize in advance for any inconvenience this may cause you tonight when you are attempting to get some hot monkey-lovin' from your wife of seven years. We know you've put up with alot, and we'd assume she has as well. We want you both to know we are sincerely apologetic that the flower shop in your vicinity will not be filling your order today because:
a) They won't get your order in time
b) They won't have the product you ordered
c) They won't get your order in time AND won't have the product you ordered
d) Shut up. We don't know why you didn't get the fucking flowers.
Thanks for Shopping with Flowers.com! We hope you'll return
soon!
So then I get home and what do I find? How about I tell you what I don't find. I don't find any fucking anniversary flowers! That's what I don't find! We're on our last thread here and I don't find any fucking anniversary flowers!
Assholes.
Posts
2 comments:
Cheap bastard! Why don't you just buy some from the store and bring them home with ya? Oh, that's right- you have a crotch rocket and the flowers would be stems by the time you reached home.=)
Actually, I think a bunch of stems with thorns IS the offical 7th anniversary gift come to think of it.
:P
Just teasing ya bud,
Terry
Is that a cover story ? As you may know, eCommerce is very reliable and the people that work in that field treat every order as if it were their own. I seriously doubt that professionals of that caliber would allow your order to go unfulfilled.
I got an Outlook notification about your anniversary and started to call you because I thought there was a chance that you'd forget. I'm glad you remembered (I'll go along with the cover story). I hope y'all had (or will have) a great celebration.
It's hard to believe that it was just seven years ago last night that two of your best friends were hitting on what's her name...
Post a Comment